Today’s Four Agreements Card, by Don Miguel Ruiz is from Don’t Make Assumptions. The card reads:
Speak Openly and Honestly
When you speak openly and honestly, you won’t have to make assumptions. The day you stop making assumptions, you will communicate cleanly and clearly, and achieve impeccability of the word.
Concerning my post about politics, and my dad’s and my relationship, I spoke honestly and openly. I wrote what I felt to be true, not as criticism of him, but to explain my troubles with him. If you look at the post, you’ll see that he replied, and maybe jumped a little salty at me. I don’t think he’d rather have me lie, so I feel cornered. That is the child in me responding to her dad. Speaking honestly, for me, trumps everything else. I have lied for too long in my life — no more. And as I had no intention of hurting his feelings, and have told him that, I feel like my part is done. Probably for the first time in my life, I told my truth without fear of how others would react. Feels okay.
But this highlights a problem I have, posting about my family. I can’t write about myself without including my family — they all have had great influence over me in the past, and in the present. I have no intention of hurting anyone. But as sister DB said months ago, it’s my blog and I’m the one who decides what goes in. Thanks, DB!
I needed courage and fortitude to publish that other post. I faced, (successfully, I think,) saying things I knew Dad may misinterpret. There are not too many people in the world who can truly understand what a huge step that was. Now I wish I’d said something decades ago — we might have had a friendlier relationship, I certainly would have felt less fear.