Now, now, now — no?

Daily Affirmation from Abraham-Hicks, 8/20/12:

Be glad that you don’t have instant manifestation. This buffer of time is really your friend. It’s your opportunity to observe and to ponder and to visualize, and to remember. It’s your opportunity to take an Emotional Journey that might be different from what you’re actually observing.

— Abraham

Excerpted from the workshop in San Antonio, TX on Saturday, November 13th, 2004 # 538

In this affirmation, Abraham offers us a different way of looking at the Law of Attraction.  I don’t often think of this aspect of things — I am always going to be a now, now, now person, I’m afraid.  Recently, I reflected on some of my quick decisions, and they were decisions away from the joy of which he speaks.

I pause, once again, to recall that voice, my conscience, which tells me I am incapable of good decisions.  Probably because I’ve made so few in my life.  I can remember back to when I was 5-years-old; I made a bad decision then; it was the first bad decision I remember making, though Mom tells me of a couple of doozies from when I was a toddler.

As I aged, I refined my bad choices into a personality.  I maintained that personality, with brief forays into happiness, until I was 50.  I won’t link all of the posts describing this behavior, but enter bad choices in the Search box, and  you’ll have reading material for a month!  When I made good choices, I couldn’t string more than two or three before I fell off the wagon.

From age 34, I listened in the small corner of my mind, to the important distinctions people offered.  I loved and respected my teachers, as I do now.  But the information, the heart of the spiritual change I needed, remained hidden in that neglected corner.  Even with this mental primer of ways to make good, joyful choices, I still needed decades to incorporate any of the principles into my spirit.  One good trait in my corner was my mind’s ability to question and mull and come to conclusions, even when I am totally lost on the surface.

All of those precepts and notions and good ideas, some very simple and some very complicated, gelled for me on the day a friend treated me meanly and with malice.  My email response was so full of expletives, if I’d put asterisks over all those words, the page would have looked like black snow.  I hurt at this horrible time.  Then, suddenly, one important bit of wisdom came up into my conscience:  No one can hurt me unless I let them.   And I understood, finally, absolutely what that lesson meant.

My sister S. (my best friend in the world, and the master I was meant to study with and emulate,) is the person who gently taught those lessons for all those years. I would be a much sadder, sicker, maybe dying person, if I didn’t have S.’s help.  But this new/old friend taught me too, about being optimistic.  I didn’t want to lose him; I decided I wouldn’t.

In fact I decided that, for the rest of my life, I was going to be happy.  And I was.

Yeah, right.

I was very happy, for months.  Then, one day, I forgot some meds, and I could feel myself sinking back down to that awful depression.  Immediately, I believed that my whole plan had been flawed, and I was doomed to be depressed once again.  Gods, I am so black and white. By the time I regained my composure, the next day, I saw my plan was incomplete.  No one is happy all the time, and I could not expect any special favors.  From then, I followed a new plan:  to be content, even when I was sad.  I understood that if I live as though happiness is mine, even when I feel sad, joy will accompany me for the rest of my life.

So it does.  The Law of Attraction in action:  If I focus on joy, satisfaction, contentment, those things will come to me. Just as, when I am depressed and defeated and unwilling to think anything could work out, my life contained more and more sadness and despair.  Now that I see the difference, I am able to accept that my happiness or sadness is in my hands.  Thus, I can choose; not to do so is to mistake the most important part of the entire philosophy: to live happily, through all the ups and downs, I must learn to happily live.

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