With apologies to my readers who are of a more gentle or timid nature, I intend to cover an indelicate subject in this post.
One of the most difficult of my old habits to overcome is a tendency to carry stuff around for years after — to dwell on the crap I’ve picked up through the decades of my life. I clutch all that crud to me, too anxious to let any of it go, fearing that past history defines me, and if I release it, I risk losing myself.
I am reminded of this situation because, as I write, our maintenance man is attending a situation in my bathroom that requires a snake. The problem is pretty obvious, as is the solution — the need to eliminate a bunch of crap.. So advised a dear friend when I told her what was happening. “Get rid of your shit, Judith. I laughed, but her counsel stuck with me, and I understand why.
Our bodies cannot function if they don’t rid themselves of the wastes of metabolism. Young parents monitor newborns carefully, and one of the big questions is, “”Did the baby poop?” This question is often treated as something of a joke by others, and even the parents laugh off any worry. But if a newborn infant doesn’t quickly begin its bodily functions, panic may well ensue, with demands that the doctor find out why the child is having trouble. Even the least educated parents know that holding on to that shit is dangerous.
Yet I, (and I believe this applies to most of us,) continue to lug around the bags and bags of emotional shit I have picked up in the course of my life. I don’t often stop to consider how much my shit detracts from my overall emotional health. It matters not the particulars of this collection of past failures, broken beliefs, and learned behaviors; I do myself no favors by keeping them around, by dwelling on previous situations. Part of this process is forgiving oneself, but first we must agree that to let the past pass on is vital. From Brainy Quotes,
I am told that the clinical definition of insanity is the tendency to do the same thing over and over again and expect different results.
We may not be insane for holding on, but we can certainly do better is we can just let our shit go.